Life in the Aeri lane (or when the child becomes the parent)

[aerianya]

God what a week!
I have been around just not saying much.
My Mom fell again ( the last time the day after Christmas) I had to leave work to beat feet to the Hospital because my daughter couldn't get her off the floor.( She'd left work to ride to the rescue because Mom couldn't remember my dh's cellphone number)
We've been house hunting and talking to our bank about our options for moving her in with us.
The idea is making my head hurt.Our house is totally unsuitable for walker access.
We've found out just how hard it is in our area to find a house with no stairs or a bed and bath on the ground level with the living area.
I just quit my job too, so I could spend more time helping her out. You know trying to keep her in her own apt as long as possible by cleaning up and doing her laundry etc.
Anyway she had a procedure the other day that's hopefully gonna help with the legs giving out, and will be in rehab for several weeks. That gives us some breathing and research space to explore all the options.

House hunting has always been an adventure , to see all the possibilities and then find out the problems are the same everywhere.
However, I can see my independence slipping away already. Being an only my Mom has always tried to *um shall we say guide my life choices in the direction she thought they should take other than my own. Funny though, now she begins to see why I married the man I picked instead of her preference. All these years she talked him down and even tried to turn our oldest daughter against him (only screwed up their relationship to the point she didn't even want to see her) and now finally when he takes charge of all the things that need to be done and invites her into our home does she understand.
I hope I can be as forgiving if she goes back to her old ways.

Enough whining, on the important stuff. I'll be home more so, I think I'm gonna try to do icons of the week for jb_daily on fridays.
Oh, and andeincascade Thank you! It was screened posting so I couldn't answer.
Just say the word and I'll try to tell you how.(using PS 7.0 and Image Ready) Not sure about others, but we can give it a shot.

Comments

[maubast.livejournal.com]

I just want you to know I'm thinking of you.

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

Thanks, you know that really means a lot.
The whole reason that I started (originally)an lj was to have someplace safe to vent, even if only for myself. Just to know there are others out there that care enough to say something means we're never really alone in our chaos and confuzzlement.

[maubast.livejournal.com]

You're welcome. I understand how it is, I help my mom and dad out. I moved in with them when I separated from my SO and never moved back out, since they needed my help, so I totally understand.

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

There is something to be said for the extended family....I'll try to think of it later*lol!

[mab-browne.livejournal.com]

I'm anxiously watching my own mother's lease on independence slowly run out, and she's far more amenable sounding a person than your mother. These things put a stress on everyone involved, so good luck for sorting out something suitable.

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I guess in all my whining I made her sound worse than she is most of the time, but baggage is really hard to lose sometimes.

[arnie1967.livejournal.com]

Oh, Aerianya, I really, really hope it doesn't come to you having to look after her. But, if it does, feel free to vent loudly and often. It's better to get it all out than try to keep it in. ::hugs tightly::

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah, that's what lj is for.
I know you've already been through all this.

[snailbones.livejournal.com]

::hugs you hard::

Venting is good! You need to let the frustrations out - and huge life changes like this are about as difficult as it gets. Good luck with it all - your husband sounds like a real star, bless him.

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

your husband sounds like a real star
Most of the time, but just like everyone else he has his moments.

[betagoddess.livejournal.com]

Can't do much but give you *hugs* and wish you all good things in life, including better times with your Mom.

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

I'm hoping things can improve and They already have a lot. I think the loss of some of her independence may be effecting the way she sees things now.
We can really do this, I know we can. Just have to make sure everyone has someplace to retreat to when it's needed.

[betagoddess.livejournal.com]

That must be a very hard time of life for sure.

Make sure you have respite care, for when YOU need spoiling. =>}

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

We're trying to look on the bright side, remodel the house get a new house it's a great adventure.
Thanks for the tip,
I already have volunteers.

[betagoddess.livejournal.com]

Great! From everything I've seen, that's the only way to make it through such times. =>}

[luna-61.livejournal.com]

::Hugs:: Hopefully it will all work out and I'm glad you have others there to help you.

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

I think it will, just have to make sure everyone works on it.
Thanks.

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Wow! Major live changes are afoot. Take care of yourself!

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

I know *whew* huh?
Thank you.

[angelvette67.livejournal.com]

Good luck with the house re-modeling/hunting! That in itself can be quite a headache o.0

I hope your mum feels better, as it will effect everyone's mood in the long run. When I was young, my gran lived with us for 15 years. It took a lot out of our family life, so maybe before you bring your mum home, you should talk things over with your family about ground rules, and try to get everyone, including your mum, to stick to them.

(((hugs)))

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

We already take care of a lot of things for her, laundry, cleaning. some cooking, shopping.She lives in the same city but a fair distance when I need to run over for something small( but crisis proportion for her).
I am hoping her moving in may simplify things a little. A least I won't be worring about her all the time.
Everyone will just need their own retreat space.
I'll probably have to find my "Mom's Busy Take a Number" wall thing with the little take off number hearts and put it back up.*lol